Good habits alternate with bad; I work out, I eat potato chips. I write five pages of an essay; I waste untold hours playing Sudoku. I'm emotionally mature with my boyfriend; I let my room be a mess, and don't clean my desk or do my taxes on time. Perfection eludes me. The best I can do is be nice to people and try to write at least a few pages a day. That's not much, but practiced consistently it has gotten me here.
And here is...ten pounds over ideal weight--(alright 13, but who is counting?) Five unsold essays in the pipeline, awaiting/hoping for acceptances, publications and paychecks, a couple of new good ideas, queasy stomach from switching to black tea instead of coffee in an effort to lose weight (I know, but I can't drink coffee without cream, so...)
Poetry class was stellar last night--it always is. I feel like this group of people is bringing out the best in me, and frankly not having to teach 15 other classes a week means I can be more present for them as well. We have been having a fine time, word-playing, divining, shape-shifting, musicking the language. I've been learning and writing right along with them.
Today I get my shots for Malawi! Excited and nervous--I hate shots. When I was a kid I used to scream bloody murder whenever I had to get one, embarrassing my mother who said I frightened all the other kids in the waiting room. Now I'm an adult--I drive myself to the place where they will stick me. Actually the only one I'm afraid of is the tetanus--I've heard that really hurts. It might put a crimp in swimming for a day or two. I still don't have my return ticket--the travel agent who is handling all that is on vacation this week. I have to get better at making those phone calls and setting the wheels in motion. See what I mean?