I just signed myself up for a core course in the Chemical Dependency Certification program at a local college. My first step towards moving into counseling work again. I have doubts about this--will I like it? Will I be bored? Will it be a waste of time and money? Are there any jobs out there? But I have been trying to get my butt into graduate school for twenty years now--longer--twenty-eight--yikes! And I am so interested in the brain and how it works and all the things that afffect it. So, here goes.

It's a program designed for working adults, so that means weekends--C and I won't get our lazy wonderful Sunday mornings together--but he supports me taking this new step. He knows that as the poet in the schools work has dried up I've been loathe to go out and beat the bushes to find or create more. It was great while it lasted, but I've been doing it for seventeen years or so, and free-lance work is unsatisfying in some ways because you never get to dig in and commit (of course you also avoid feeling trapped.) I am not enough of a hustler to make much money at it, I tend to lie back and let the gigs come to me. Sometimes they do, and sometimes they are great gigs, but I'm ready earn a steadier paycheck and use different parts of myself. (I realize that as the economy is melting down may not be the best time to invest in a career change, but hey. There will always be drug addicts.)

At the same time, work on the next book of poems continues apace. I have a few revisions to do, and a couple more pieces to write and then it's ready to start sending out. I need to turn my attention toward the book of essays next. I printed out and looked at the hard copy of the women's self-defense piece which I had thought was so wonderful only to discover that it wasn't. Wonderful. It was lame and stiff. How did that happen?

I'm about to run out the door to teach my Tuesday evening essay class. I love this class, so full and committed. Last Sunday I took my Little Sister and her real big sister out to San Ramon to hear the finalists for the Contra Costa Poetry Out Loud recitation contest. Several of my students were reciting--I wanted them all to win. I also loved the students I didn't coach. I still don't know who won because my little sister got so restless and squirmy that we had to leave at intermission--she just couldn't sit in her seat a moment longer.

I took them to Borders where she acted up even more, and after buying her a Barbie book (her choice, definitely not mine,) and her sister Twilight, took them home. It was raining on and off all day, which was great--we need it--but dates with my little sister always work better when we can be outside and she can run around.

Yesterday E and I walked along the Marina, talking about all kinds of things, plans, family, travels, houses, partners. It was bright and cold and windy (it's colder today.) I gave her the latest version of the new book to read--of course it has changed a little since I gave it to her, I keep adding to it. I found out from the publisher that See How We Almost Fly will be published in the fall of this year--probably in October. Look for it then. Pearl Editions.